How We Rate
We take the review process very seriously! Quality Breakfast Burritos must perfectly balance bold, robust flavors with delicate, textural variation. To our knowledge no objective scoring-system for Breakfast Burritos has been developed (unfortunately the funding in this realm of science just doesn’t exist). So, as scientists, we’ve taken it upon ourselves to attempt to capture the complexities wrapped in each tortilla by developing the break-down below. Although it is somewhat painful to boil down a Breakfast Burrito to a single number, we feel that through this system we can fairly assign and rank our favorite little (or sometimes massive) morning munchies. Below, you can find out how we rate.
#1: Tortilla
Although the tortilla is the first thing we see before eating, it is often overlooked. At Burritista, we believe this thin layer of flour or corn is integral to the overall experience and should really be thought of as the Window to the Soul of the Breakfast Burrito. Important factors include texture, structural integrity and folding technique (including appropriate ‘tucking’ of the ends). Scored: 1-10.
#2: Filling Textures
Textures of the filling also play a key role. A good BB should have a variety of components distinguishable by mouth feel alone, from the meat to the eggs to whatever else is bundled inside. As Shakespeare once wrote: “It is upon the stage of texture that the players of flavor can gracefully dance and sing.” Scored: 1-10.
#3: Filling Flavors
Flavor = King. It’s what keeps us coming back for more, bite after bite. Like in #2, there should be multiple distinguishable components; however, flavors should go one step further. There are so many flavorful possibilities out there (from the basic egg and chorizo to the more exotic fire-roasted Anaheim and adobo crema) that it may seem overwhelming to try to compare them. But the good BB will harness its various flavors to create something greater than the sum of its parts: scrumptious synergy. Scored: 1-10.
#4: (Tasteful) Use of Potatoes
While this category may appear to overlap with #2 and #3, we feel that use of potatoes should be separated because it is complicated and widely disputed. While some find potatoes to be merely cheap “filler” others see them as a major bonus in a BB. To acknowledge both sides of the debate, we neither condone nor condemn potatoes upfront. Instead, we require that a good BB with potatoes must use them wisely and tastefully. Quality attributes include amount, proper cooking and flavor. Scored: 1-10.
*As of 9/28/2019, scoring in this category for a burrito without potatoes was decided to be the average of the other three scores.
Bonus: Smother Factor
We recognize that burritos come in all different shapes/sizes and that some are graced with a chili smother and some don’t necessarily need it. To keep a roughly fair playing field for scoring, the success of a BB’s garnishes (including chili smother, cheese, sour cream, etc.) is denoted by a “+” after the score when applicable. A failed smother (occurring only on the rarest of occasions) is denoted by a “-“. Naked BBs only receive a number.
Impression:
This is a one-sentence summary of the highlights and/or shortcomings of the burrito.
Score:
Overall score shall be the sum of the scores from categories #1-4 with a +/- when applicable.